The First Forty Days: Why Doing "Nothing" is Everything
The pressure settling over new mothers
The silent urge to be "up and about." To have the kettle boiled, the scatter cushions plumped, and a plate of biscuits ready for the stream of well-meaning visitors coming to peek into the pram.
We live in a culture that applauds the "bounce back." We praise the mum who is at the supermarket three days postpartum (this was definitely me!), or the one fitting into her pre-pregnancy jeans within a week. But here, in our quiet corner of the internet, I want to gently dismantle that expectation.
I want to talk about the First Forty Days. And I want to tell you why doing absolutely "nothing" is actually doing everything.
The biology of slow
When you look at a mother resting in bed with her newborn, it might look like stillness. But beneath the surface, her body is running a biological marathon.
The process of birth doesn't end when the baby arrives; it transitions into a massive physiological recalibration. Your womb, which grew to the size of a watermelon, is working incredibly hard to involute- shrinking back down to the size of a pear. This process requires immense energy. Simultaneously, your organs are shifting back into their original spaces, your blood volume is regulating, and your hormones are taking a skydive as your milk transitions.
This is not the time for vacuuming the hallway. This is the time for deep, cellular knitting.
When we rush this process and force our bodies to "host" before they are ready to "heal", we deplete the very energy reserves meant for recovery and lactation. By staying horizontal, you are allowing your body to direct every ounce of energy towards healing the wound left by the placenta and regulating your nervous system for your baby.
It’s not "woo-woo," it’s ancient wisdom
While the concept of a "Fourth Trimester" might feel like a modern buzzword, it is actually deeply rooted in human history. For thousands of years, cultures across the globe have honoured a sacred window of roughly 40 days or six weeks after birth.
In Latin America, it is La Cuarentena. In China, Zuo Yue Zi (Sitting the Month). In India, strict protocols of massage and warming foods are observed.
These traditions didn't exist because women were "delicate"; they existed because our ancestors understood the long-term cost of ignoring recovery. They knew that to protect the mother’s future health, she needed to be kept warm, fed, and secluded from the cold winds of the outside world.
It is only in our modern, fast-paced Western society that we have lost this village wisdom. We have replaced the warming soup and the massage with the pressure to "get back to normal." But birth changes you. There is no going back, only moving forward, albeit slowly.
The Sacred Pause: a soft landing
I know that simply saying "stay in bed" is easier said than done, especially when there are hungry mouths to feed or a house to manage. That is why I created The Sacred Pause.
The Sacred Pause is my postnatal package designed to physically facilitate this period of rest. It is a way of bringing the village back to you, and focuses on:
Nourishing Food: Think slow-cooked stews, warming bone broths, and oat-rich snacks delivered to your door, so you are fed without lifting a finger.
Warming Moxa: Using the ancient technique of Moxibustion to bring deep, penetrating heat back into the womb space, dispelling the "cold" of birth.
Gentle Bodywork: Soft massage and ‘closing’ rituals to help you feel held, grounded, and physically put back together.
It is about creating a sanctuary where you are mothered, so you can mother your baby.
Your permission slip
So, if you are reading this while pregnant, or perhaps in the thick of those early days, consider this your permission slip.
Lock the front door. Draw the curtains. Stay in your pyjamas. Let the washing pile up, or better yet, ask a friend to do it. Your only job right now is to smell your baby’s head, keep your feet warm, and heal. The world will still be there in forty days. For now, your world is in your arms.
Are you currently pregnant and worrying about how you’ll manage the early weeks?
I would love to help you plan your postpartum sanctuary. Book a free discovery call, and let’s chat about how I can support your slow, gentle ‘Odyssey into Motherhood’.